I Relaxed!! No I Relaxed!!… It’s All in the Perspective

The garage door motor grinds as it opens.  The clock tells me it is my husband coming home from work.  Sitting at the kitchen table clicking away on the keyboard of my lap top I briefly consider that I probably should get off my a** and start dinner.  It is after all a swimming lesson night and that means less time to make dinner and eat it.  The girls are sprawled out on the couch, arms dangling off the side, eyes glazed over, still in their PJs.  The door opens and my husband’s “ I’m so happy to be home and see all my girls, I’ve missed you face” turns to a scowl of anger.

I had done NOTHING ALL DAY!!!!  WE had done NOTHING ALL DAY!

Sunday afternoon we arrived home from a weekend of camping.  It was Francine and Olivia’s first camping experience.  My dad was so happy and so excited to introduce another generation of our family to camping and to Point Beach State Park (our most favorite camping place… lost of family history. More to come on that later).  The girls had a wonderful weekend full of new experiences, adventure and unplugged family time.  It was wonderful.  I WAS EXHAUSTED… drag me to the door, take me out of the oven, sucked the life out of me… DONE!
The hubs had not gone camping with us.  It just isn’t his thing (although we are working on him).  While I am sooo happy that the girls had a fantastic time, I did not get a break.  Being four and five years old they still are not completely independent.  Camping with them (though my fantastic, fabulous, kiss your feet sister and her hubs were with us and helped a lot) means: we go to the bathroom together, we shower together, we slept on the same blow up matress together, we sat by the fire together, we read together (they can’t just sit around the fire and read… they can’t read), we played board games together.  It was 24/7 me and Francine and Olivia!

I WAS EXHAUSTED!!!

My husband was furious.  Furious that nothing was put away from our trip.  Furious that the kitchen he had cleaned while we were gone was messy again.  Furious that dinner was not made.  Furious that I had done NOTHING!!!  In between the whirl wind of trying to get my a** in gear, trying to make dinner before swimming (did not happen… another thing for him to be furious about) and getting girls ready for swimming I tried to defend myself and explain that I just needed a day to do nothing.  I’M EXHAUSTED.
“You had the entire weekend to yourself.”, I said.
Daggers came shooting from his eyes.
“I don’t consider a whole weekend by myself fun!”
“Sh*t I would.  I would pay for that”, I think.
“Are you mad because we just got back from a vacation and I did nothing today?” I say to him.
Walking up the stairs he turns, looks at me and gives me the smile, head nod, shoulder shrug that means, “ Well yeah!”
While he thought I was on vacation, spending time with family, sitting around the camp fire and doing hardly anything, relaxing … I thought he was sitting at home doing nothing, spending time alone in a quiet house, doing, eating, watching whatever he wanted, relaxing all by himself.

Perspective is such an interesting thing.

                                                                                             
“What we see depends mainly on what we look for.” 
                                                                                John Lubbock

Family Vacation

Last Friday marked our first family get away, just us four, in four years.
We were off to Michigan.
Now I don’t know if it was the GPS, Indiana roads, construction of my lack of skills as a navigator using a GPS (deep, growling sigh to admit it might have been my fault)…
We got lost!
I’m talking terribly lost.
We got lost straight to beautiful Gary, Indiana… The “roll your windows up, lock your doors kids” nice part of Gary, Indiana.
After an hour of driving around and my hubs homing pigeon (I think a few lucky turns) like direction skills and we were back on the same ten minutes to go one mile (moving so slow someone at a slow jog could have gone faster then us), thirteen miles stretch of construction consumed road for the second time!
{Cue angelic music} We were finally back on our way to Michigan!
So…
8 Twizzlers
1 Large Gatorade
2 Handfuls of Peanut M & Ms (ok large handfuls)
1 Watchamacall it
2 Ho Ho’s
3 Handfuls of Fruit Loops
2 Cans of Coke
1 Lost Zoople (and Zoople found and Zoople broke)
1 Stretch of 13 mile, move 1 mile every 10 minutes construction heavy strip of highway
Multiple moments of found, lost and found again sanity
45 minute nap
2 States
6 hours (of a what should have been 3 hours)
We arrived at the hotel!
and the pound on the seat, laugh until you tear moment of the trip…
Hubs says :”Hey kids we are in Michigan.” 
Francine: “Daaaadddy!… We’re not in Michigan we’re still in our car!”

*Note to any concerned person regarding the quantity of unhealthy food consumed during this trip:  It was not all consumed by me!  We were on vacation people! We all had a nice healthy breakfast before we started this trip!

Half-Pint Post: WaNtEd

MamaKat has sent out her weekly Almost World Famous Writing Prompts.  This week I choose: It’s hot, the kids are home and crazy, our pets are panting, the days are long…share your number one Summer Survival Tip.  Of course I went right to work looking for the perfect Mommy Summer Survival Trip.  I came across this newspaper want ad  {wink, wink}…

I am lucky enough to be a SAHM for three months out of the year.  And while I am very aware of it during the months I work, my “Summer Survival Tip” becomes more valuable during June, July and August… TIME!!!

Don’t get me wrong, I would love to sit on the couch, watch TV, Tweet, Facebook, blog read and write the day away or even sit on the porch reading more then a paragraph without being interrupted only to have to reread it because I forgot what it said! 
On the days I am able to be fully present, on their level, belly to the floor, knees full of chalk the whine factor (their whining, not my need for it… well that too), need for warnings, limits or consequences significantly lessens.  
I would still love to sit on the couch, watch TV, Tweet, Facebook, blog read and write the day away or even sit on the porch reading there are also days where I actually have to do house work, laundry, dishes, make meals (no comment hubs… not the best house keeper, but becoming a better cook).
TIME continues to be my Summer Survival Tip… my secret weapon. A moment in the kitchen table coloring with Francine elbow to elbow, the warmth of a head on my shoulder as I read Junie B. Jones to Olivia, the peek of a smile as I look up with star sun glasses and a hot pink boa on… Time is my Summer Survival Tip and it is absolutely priceless.

                                                                                        

                                                                                           

Just on Time. Never Late.

6:00 am
Up bright and early. That is my way.

7:00am
I got a great run in and Olivia and Francine were still a sleep. Bonus. I filled the pot with water and added two scoops of grinds. Soon I would be enjoying warm, coffee goodness.
“Moommmy I’m aaaawaaake!”, I hear from the monitor.
“MOMMYY I’M A-WAKE!”, I hear from the other monitor.
And here we go.

7:30am
It was play date day and as per our usual routine Holly and I had not quite decided what we wanted to do with the girls today. Typical. We would figure out something to do. Only hitch this day… she had to be some where at 1:30. No word from Holly.

7:45am
Second cup of coffee in my belly. Girls were on the couch watching TV and I was on the computer. I started to think to myself. I probably should start to get in the shower. I probably should do something to start to get ready. If Holly calls (well, actually texts) and is ready to go I won’t be ready.

8:00am
“How about the zoo”, the text reads.
What a great idea I think.
“Meet at 9:15.”, the next text reads.
Who is she kidding! No way I’ll be ready, pack lunches, get all of us in the car and drive to the zoo by 9:15. I offer 9:45 as a time to meet and it is agreed. We will meet at 9:45.

8:15am
With a little help from Francine and Olivia lunches are made. At least one thing I needed to do is done.

My skype starts to ring. It’s Shirley. I tell her I only have 10 minutes to chat. 10 real minutes, not 10 Shirley and Laverne minutes. Who the hell am I kidding.

8:40am
25 minutes later I’m barking out orders to Olivia and Francine.

“Pick out your clothes. Then get dressed. Mommies going to get in the shower.”

Francine, “Mommy can I sit on your bed? I won’t jump!”

“Ok!”

9:05
Out of the shower. Took me extra long. Sucks when you decide to wear shorts and then you realize that you haven’t shaved your legs in a couple of days. Shaving legs… not a time saver.

Surprise, surprise the girls are actually dressed! Yeah us!!!

9:20
Hair is done, mommy is dressed, lunches are packed, girls are dressed and pottied. One thing left… I probably should feed them breakfast. No time.

9:25
The award winning mommy I am… I stop for coffee and they get to have donuts. Thank goodness I at least didn’t have to stop for gas. That is generally my luck. I decide to text Holly to let her know that we are running late. She lets me know that they are just leaving their house. She’s running later then I am.

Driving to the zoo I think of my husband. Boy if he was with us this would drive him crazy. My mind drifts to the post I wrote: Misplaced, never lost. I think ya know: Just on Time, Never Late. would make another great post idea.

10:05
We make it to the zoo. I get the girls and our backpack out of the car. My friends car drives up. Who am I kidding…. I love to think I’m just on time. I’m Late!!