The other morning I saw it.
Two different people, who I follow because they share inspirational drawings, self care advice, make me laugh, make me think and who genuinely care for people, students and our mental health did it (and I am paraphrasing)…
“We know that 2020 has been awful and terrible and hard but what is something that has changed for the better or something you are looking forward to next year?”
At first I thought , “Oh for goodness sake! Is this really going to be a thing?! Are we going to have to see these types of posts until the new year?” Then I thought, “Are well intentioned people going start flooding us with inspiration and phrases that has us setting goals and picking words for the new year?”
The tears started to fill my eyes.
These words, right now, just didn’t feel right to me (or maybe it is just me)
I am in over my head. Parenting and its demands during COVID is no joke. My children’s need for my time, their need for my emotional support and their need for my love and time to help navigate all the feelings of full remote learning, being stuck together all the time and being away from their friends brings. Then there’s being a teacher during a pandemic. It is an emotional roller coaster. The energy and focus it takes to balance all your usual teacher responsibilities with supporting a student’s emotional needs, teaching content…oh all while navigating having some students person, some remote learning and it changes daily. Oh and the politics…oye!
My emotions are raw.
Now I don’t have any answers. I don’t know what is the right way to end the year. I know the new year gives so many hope. I know the end of the year means we are closer to normal and closer to the end of all this. I also know the new year is usually a time for reflection, resolutions and goal setting. I just have to wonder. Is this the time to press those who are feeling raw, tired, overwhelmed, dealing with trauma, emotionally on edge, mourning the loss of holidays and moments missed to reflect? Or is it time, like most things in 2020, to think differently about how we welcome the new year? Instead of feeling compelled to push each other through it, is it time to think about how we can continue to support each? A time to keep reminding each other of the value and deep importance of self care and gratitude, to be mindful of each others worlds and experiences, to keep leaning on each other, checking in on each other and listening.
Because until we can start to heal and are ready to move forward I’m not ready, yet, to go back to normal.
