Donning My Shield

My phone’s screen illuminated… Alex Iwashyna has shared with you on Google+ It said, “Love this….”

“hummmm…that interesting. Maybe I’ll read it,” I thought. “Nahhhh, I’m too tired.”

A little voice whispered to me… go ahead and read it.

I clicked on the link.

“What the heck is this?!” I grumbled to myself. “What is Alex sharing?!”

Then I began to read and suddenly I felt like I was meant to have seen the article.

Golda Poretsky, the author, shared her “deep spiritual practice of Not Giving a Sh*t.This has to be a joke, I thought. She wasn’t joking, she was quite serious! She went on to share her struggles with others who judge her by the way she looks instead of getting to know what she can do.

“Well… I am not over weight so how is not giving a shit about what others think of my weight going to help me? What the heck did Alex get from this?”

Then Golda wrote, “If you notice that you’re holding yourself back from doing something you want to do because of other people’s opinions, it’s time to get on board with this spiritual practice.”

…suddenly my heart became heavy.

For weeks I have been owning others words. Taking them, holding on to them, letting them weigh me down, letting them define me, feeling captured and trapped by them, thinking that it was me that needed to change so their words would change. My efforts to improve my listening skills (really listening to others…not just hearing others) and trying to learn from what they communicated to me left this huge giagantic painful weight that I just could not shake.

After reading the post I realized (and Golda speaks to this too) I don’t want to not care what others think or not listen to others. I need to be selective in what I let in.

Golda closed her post with three techniques for starting my own practice of Not Giving a Shit… 1) Just say it…”I don’t give a shit!” 2) Energy Bounce visualizing the negative energy bouncing off of you 3) Feel Love And Gratitude For Those That Support You recognizing and feeling the gratitude and love that is in your life.

So while I know learning to balance caring with not giving a shit and relearning to own all the goodness in my life will not be an easy task, I feel like a gigantic weight has been lifted from my heart. I am now armed with a new tool that will empower me to decide how much I am going let others opinions or negative feelings decide how I feel about myself.

Sheild

I’ve got my Shield and I’m going to learn how to use it!